I read rants from mothers about the "magic" being taken out of childhood by this generation of politically correct, tactlessly honest, intensive parents. Those who don't hoax about Santa and the Easter Bunny. No tooth fairies or fairies of any sort for that matter. And if you do dare to display the Elf on your shelf, why, you're some selfish, shortsighted, unthinking sap who's OK with LYING to your kids.
I would love to have an elf on my shelf. I can't think of a way to introduce it without the manipulating their behavior part... and frankly, I'm not sure I'm capable of mixing make believe with abstract concepts such as the creator of the universe. Maybe it's not that big a deal to most of us, but I really am not that trusting that my kids won't get it all confused. I've striven most of my life to find what is true. I'm still not sure how Jonah could survive in the fish, but clearly the tall one believes that there was an angelic gospel choir in there with him providing light and singing about God's mercy. And a talking caterpillar. He's four. I don't know how to explain that some parts of that are true and some are (probably) not. Frankly all of it sounds crazy right? I'm feeling pressed to explain faith instead of simply living it. I feel like I must distinguish it from imagination and conjecture.
My boys know how to identify vampires by sight but have no idea what they really represent. I try to maintain dissonance. The big bad wolf wants to blow the houses down but we never talk about why. And when we do- am I the only one who tries to help toddlers picture the savagery of nature? "Y'know, wolves don't have thumbs so they can't hold knives to chop the pigs up. They just bite hunks of skin and flesh off with their teeth and eat the pigs raw."
Someone just this very second explained to me that the dinosaurs lived before the people and they lived next to the volcanoes. Then when the volcanoes erupted all the dinosaurs died and then the people were born. I'm OK with that. No, I don't know how to incorporate that with where the first man was in God's plan. How to rationalize that evolution is a theory and creationism is an idea. That one school says they are mutually exclusive and another says they are not... and I'm expected to tell my children what is true.
I KNOW the love of God is true. I KNOW that he sent his perfect son to make a perfect church and reconcile man to the maker.
I'm wary of the world indoctrinating my children to believing that faith is a myth. I'm wary of being accused of indoctrinating my children to believing a myth. I want to introduce and teach these things on my own terms. In my heart I guess I believe that this is more important than the letter of the week. And certainly more important than how many days remain until *insert holiday here*.
Am I teaching that? Um... no. Am I living that? Definitely. So I suppose the answer to the first question is "yes." Am I blogging on here moaning that I see enthusiasm for holidays but not for Christ? Potentially.
I want to teach that. Alongside two plus two. And to know that my kids think that Halloween is great, but that God and his intentions are greater and more worthy of reflection and celebration.
I don't want to count down to Halloween. I don't want to count down to Christmas or the Fourth of July.
Sure they'll be kids! Sure we'll observe the traditions of our culture! And hold up what the Christ modeled as important and worthy of celebration! And they'll be children who eventually become young men.
Talking with a friend, she explained that the influence out there will never diminish, only grow. I can rationalize that what is normal for kids this age is harmless. But can I imagine rationalizing the same way when they're 15? "I suppose there's nothing wrong with dating at 16. And yeh, they'll risk boundaries and potentially their dignity and their very lives. 'Cuz... I guess... they're teenaged boys. "
I was sadly informed last year that (like the elf on the shelf), my sons will not. Date the cheerleaders in high school.
I'm still letting that sink in.
They will not be sent to risk and explore at that age (at any age!) with other people's daughters. They will not learn how to relate to women being taught by teenaged girls. There will be intention in every relationship they form when they are ready to try at forming relationships intentionally. And that intention will be examined and guided by disciples before them, learning to love women of worth in a giving in a selfless way. Submitting to one another and learning to lead and protect along side brothers in Christ who've walked this road.
Yeh. I know it's different. But that's my point.
My kids are different.
We don't count down to Halloween.
